April 21

I will remember this date for two reasons; I lost my baby, and the Nigerian presidential elections.

The loss of a child is something I will not wish even on my worst enemy. It is extremely painful. Anyway I woke up on this bright Saturday determined to beat my husband in scrabble as he beat me on almost all the games on the previous saturday. instead we had to rush to hospital. My car typically would not start so we called my brother in law who practically flew down and off we were to the hospital, there was no car in sight,no buses, no bikes, absolutely none. I kept thinking, what if we didn't have a car, or someone we could call, when the country declares no movement, does it occur to them that some women would go into preterm labour, that some children would have terrible asthma/epileptic/ulcer attacks, and would need to be rushed to hospitals? How are these emergency cases expected to get to hospital, with no cabs, buses or bikes plying the roads, and no ambulances to call.Are they just supposed to sit at home quietly and die? I have never tried the Celtel emergency 199 service. I do hope it works, I certainly appreciate their effort more.

So we get to the hospital. I am rushed into an emergency room, The O and G is called, He is at a polling booth, he comes as soon as he can but it is still a while and all this time, the girl bleeds away. He says it is bad, surgery is the only way out, and so the anaethesist is called and the paediatrician, the clock is ticking, they arrive as soon as they can.

My baby lives but only for a few hours. they did their best,and I believe them. My anger is more at the system, I had tried to call the hospital from home,network issues. Maybe just maybe, if everything was in place before I got there, maybe I would be holding my baby in my arms now.

On a lighter note, we sent an sms out to people informing them of our tragedy, we said they could sms but we were not receiving calls and people started calling immediately! Is it that we don't read? And people said all sorts, it's better it happened now than if the child was older? says who? some said maybe I wasn't resting enough? like I wasn't feeling bad enough! And they dared to blame me.
Our families and friends have however been wonderful. My mother in law particularly, and my friends took turns to be with me at home, I didn't lift a finger for two weeks. May God bless them.