Friday, June 29, 2007


That the name is female circumcision and not female genital mutilation. That the white man labeled it female genital mutilation in a bid to make Africa seem barbaric. I am against the practice. I do not see the need for it but I think the practitioners should be educated and not condemned. What they do, they do mostly out of ignorance.

That the definition lies with each of us; it could be a feeling, a choice, a passion, a fat bank account, great sex etc. It all depends.

That it is not a do or die affair. It does not guarantee happiness, success or anything of the sort. That there are no laid down rules for achieving a good marriage, what works in yours may not work in mine. For some husbands, submitting to them may work, for others you may need to flog them, just kidding.

That it is allowed. If a man hits you once, run. You don’t know what he is going to do the next time. Many have died before from domestic violence, don’t be the next. I don’t know if a woman can beat a man up, but if your wife beats you up, run. Violence should not be tolerated, particularly not in the home, there is too much at stake.

That I cannot judge what I do not understand.

That it works both ways, As the married man finds himself attracted to some gal other than his wife, so does the woman. You may not be able to control your feelings or thoughts, but you most certainly can control your actions.

That it is not inevitable. We can actually have a poor free country and we shouldn’t wait for the government. They have disappointed us for several years now and may continue to do so. I am going to take a leaf from 36inchesofbrownlegs and sponsor a child. Do same if you can. You may not be able to upturn an entire ocean but you can cast a stone to cause many ripples.

That is the fruit of love so play excess of it. (This is a stolen line, Shakespeare I think)

That society doesn’t favor her, dating back to the bible days, where the adulterous woman was caught in the act, which means the man must have been there too but they brought only the woman for stoning. So women learn to love yourselves. You are your own best friend. Be always prepared..

That it is the best gift God has given us all. So live up! Work hard, play hard, eat well, exercise, and love more. You may be lucky and live long or you may die tomorrow. There are no certainties so give each day your best shot.

More on Tinapa

A side view of the studio Tinapa
The entrance
Everywhere is so green in Calabar
On of the shops
And another

The lovely Tinapa

A view of some shops

Friday, June 22, 2007

Away in Tinapa

I have been away in Calabar,having the time of my life. Donald Duke makes me proud. Tinapa is absolutely beautiful, will put up pictures later. My internet connection is crazy at the moment so I may be out of touch for a while till I can change sources. Will be back as soon as I can.

Shout out to Chimamnda and Achebe. Inspite of Obj's attempts to drag our(nigeria) name in the mud, these guys refused to let him succeed. Nigeria has received some positive recognition via these duo for their creative writing excellence. To Chimamnda and Achebe, I doff my hat.